Something that's been on my mind this week...

 I don’t really know how to say this, and I feel like if I say the wrong thing it might come out misunderstood. But I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately.

I know that I personally have changed so much in the last few years, and I have been told that since having kids I’ve definitely changed. And honestly, I feel like that’s true for every single mum out there.

For example, before kids, I used to go to the gym every single day after work — Monday to Friday — for an hour and a half. Then I’d come home, cook dinner, go to bed, wake up, and do it all again the next day. Since I’ve had kids, which was five years ago now, I haven’t stepped foot in a gym once. And that’s a huge adjustment, right? That’s just one small example of the things mums give up.

Now, I am back doing some sort of fitness, but it’s not in the same capacity. And I guess what I’m trying to say is that mums have to adjust their life, their routine, and the way they do things to fit around their kids. And that’s totally fine.

But when someone tells you that you’ve changed after having kids — and it’s said in a way that feels negative — that’s what I really struggle to understand.

Because of course I’ve changed.

Now my version of fitness looks like going for a run — maybe a 3k, 20-minute run, or a 45-minute run twice a week. Or doing Pilates at night once the kids are in bed. Or fitting in some sort of movement while they’re asleep. And I’m perfectly okay with that.

But when people point it out like it’s a detriment or a negative thing… that’s where I struggle.

I’m not even sure if this is coming out right, but I think what I’m really trying to say is that mums give up so much of their life for their kids — and we accept that. We’re not unhappy about it.

I’m not unhappy that my life has changed. I feel so incredibly blessed to have my children, and I’m so grateful for it.

It just feels like a natural evolution — going from being independent and doing your own thing, to becoming a mum where everything revolves around your kids.

But I think there are still people out there who don’t fully understand that we choose to put our kids first.

And I want to be clear — I’m not saying they come first 24/7. There are times when I have to put myself first, or my relationship first, or my work first. There are definitely moments where my kids don’t come first.

But in the grand scheme of things… they’re three and five.

Their life literally depends on me putting them first.

If I don’t, who will?

Who is going to keep them safe, alive, supported — at this stage of their life?

Right now, I have to put them first.

When they’re 18, 19, 20 and moving out of home, it will be different. They’ll always be a priority, but they’ll become their own person. They’ll be adults.

But those first 18 years… they need me.

It’s my job — our job — to raise incredible humans. To keep them safe, protected, and mentally and emotionally healthy.

Anyway… this is a bit of a ramble.

I don’t really know where I was going with it, other than wanting to share what’s been on my mind. Mainly around how we, as women, evolve into mums.

We’re not mad about it.

But when people question that we’ve changed… I think that’s where I struggle. I don’t understand how others don’t understand.

I don’t know if that makes sense.

But thank you so much for reading along today. And if you want to continue this conversation, please feel free to send me an email or message me on Instagram — I’d honestly love to chat more about it.

Sahra x